Halloween and The Award

Hello Dearies,

I am having a Halloween party this Saturday night.

I have invited Dagwood, Eddie, Wayne, Bailey, Hagface, Lily, Pig and Rat.

Stupidman is carving the pumpkins. I hope he doesn't cut off his fingers.

I am baking all the cupcakes and pumpkin cakes and making all the decorations. I want the house to look creepy but Stupidman keeps getting scared of the plastic spiders and bats and keeps hitting at them and pulling them down. I keep telling him they are fake but he won't believe me. Idiot.

I am also making potions! But Stupidman tried to drink them. Thankfully the potions are harmless and are just filled with Canada Dry with food colouring.

Stupidman wants to go trick or treating too.

I am going to dress up as a druid with flowers. I will look very pretty. Stupidman is going to be a merman. I made him the costume. It looks very nice.

Stupidman was sad I drained the pool because he wanted to swim around in it and test out the costume.

Also I have won the Prolific Blogger award!

Goodbye,

Granny

Thanksgiving

Hello Dearies,

Yesterday I had my Thanksgiving dinner. I served mashed potatoes, turkey, sweet potato pie and sweet potatoes, turnip, stuffing, cranberry sauce, buns, gravy, and fish (for Stupidman). I made pumpkin, blueberry and apple pies and pumpkin cake (for Stupidman).

I served wine (not for Stupidman) and Rat and Pig brought root beer. Stupidman drank too much rootbeer and got really hyper.

Every year I like to have a grand feast with lots of people, but not mean people like Tanktop Tammy or Lawnboy Larry. I invited Dagwood, Wayne, Eddie, Burne, Nester and Bonnie, Lane and his girlfriend Kayleigh, Bailey the faun and Lily and Hagface came along too. Stupidman invited his imaginary friends Pig and Rat who turned out not to be imaginary!

We fed Lily and Hagface outside on the porch with the dogs. Everyone else sat in my beautiful dining room. I used my best dishes. We had classical music in the background and had candles on the table. I told Stupidman not to touch them but he kept trying to put out the flame with his fingers and got burned. Idiot.

It turns out that Stupidman's non imaginary friends Pig and Rat have disgusting table manners. As does Kayleigh and Lane. Pig and Rat brought their pet pig and pet rat and the rat kept climbing on the table trying to get over to the turkey. And the pig keptmaking gross noises. Disgraceful. I put their pets outside. I must speak with Stupidman on his choice of friends.

And now I must rest in my rocking chair and knit.

Good-bye,

Granny

Stupidman's Imaginary Friends and My Yellow Dress

Hello Dearies,

I found the bug that was killing my flowers so I shot it with my shot gun. Then I went in to bake pies. I am making pumpkin, apple and blueberry pie. My favourite is pumpkin.

Stupidman was bugging me about the pumpkin cake but I already made it but didn't tell him because he will eat it.

I made Stupidman wear a sweater today because it is getting colder. And I closed the pool too because if I don't Stupidman will fall into without even knowing it.

I bought myself a new wool dress today. It is yellow and very pretty. I will wear it on Thanksgiving dinner.

Stupidman came in to tell me there are two weird guys in his tree house and now they are his best friends. So I went out to check to see who was in the tree house and it was empty. I think Stupidman has an imaginary friend again! I won't tell him they're not real.

And now he wants to invite them to the Thanksgiving dinner. So I said sure.

Good bye,

Granny